~ I do ~ I cry ~

It is getting closer, that year, that first year is right around the corner.

Why do I write to you to tell I cry, maybe it will help you or maybe it will help me, all I know at this moment that it comes out of of nowhere those tears, the sobbing, the nightmares.In my lifetime, I have experienced many tragedy's, but i have to tell you there is no greater tragedy than a mother losing a child at any age ~ I shall never ever go one day without thinking about Jonathan, he was/is my child and that bond will never be broken.
I do have to take care of myself and life life as best as I can everyday now for the rest of my life. I am actually not really telling these stories to you, so don't think you are that special. If I don't write things down, I'll forget.

So ~ we all cry ~ and maybe have a laugh together ~ maybe it will help us both!
Laughter - that's another story~ ;)

Let's just cry, just for today! It will in the long run make us stronger, believe it!
So in closing, I did some research, as I believe I was poked to do so!
Click on the links to find out more about how to cope and why you cry ~

Mayo Clinic
Anniversary reactions can also evoke powerful emotional memories — experiences in which you vividly recall the feelings and events surrounding your loved ones death. You might remember in great detail where you were and what you were doing, for instance, when your loved one died.

Alternet.org
How Crying Can Make You Healthier ~
"The increasing research into crying and its beneficial health effects may also make shedding tears less of a taboo behaviour. As Professor Frey, author of Crying: the Mystery of tears, points out, it is no accident that crying has survived evolutionary pressures. Humans are the only animals to evolve this ability to shed tears in response to emotional stress, and it is likely that crying survived the pressures of natural selection because it has some survival value,'' he says. "It is one of the things that makes us human.''