What I am finding out.

I am on an adventure today and adventure where I don't know how or where the day shall lead me, sometimes, I think to myself that this is everyday of my life lately. No matter where I go, to the grocery store, the bank ~ or just for a walk around the street to stretch my legs it's painful within my body, mind and spirit.

It's what way to early in the morning, still I have my coffee, take my medicine, relax for a while, and read through all my son's journal's. He has written the most beautiful stories, the most prolific thoughts I have ever read thus far at least the way I comprehend. A gift that he has left for me, for me to read, enjoy and learn. To gain knowledge of my son who left too soon, but helped so many.

Today, I have come to the realization that my son seems to have found inspiration from the girl he loved, his first love, his only love. His first girlfriend. Step back ( as he says it in his writings ) & the demon's in he had hidden in his soul.

Do you read the last page of a story or book first? I always do.

Today I share with you this. Today this is for her. I shall not mention her real name, as Jon did not either - most of his paper's were for school I am assuming.

July 5, 2001

"And I will always say I love Renee. I love the sunshine in her face. Her gaze of approval stokes my eyes, and I feel comfort. Bring me night, or bring me day...anything for my sweet Renee."
jon mceachern excerpt from journal entry.